Silver Doe
by KyraLeonheart
Summary: mostly onesided Snape x Lily. The first time they kissed it was him kissing her, the second time they kissed it was her kissing him. The third time they both kissed. Only three times… and never more. DH SPOILERS
1. The first

_**Summary:**_ (mostly one-sided) Snape x Lily. The first time they kissed it was him kissing her, the second time they kissed it was her kissing him. The third time they both kissed. Only three times… and never more. DH SPOILERS

-

_**SILVER DOE**_

-

The first time they kissed it was him kissing her.

The second time they kissed it was her kissing him.

The third time they both kissed.

Only three times…

… and never more.

-

_**The first…**_

Ten years old Severus Snape looked at the clock tower for what felt like the hundredth time in twenty minutes.

"She should be here by now…"

It was strange indeed. Lily Evans was never late. A scowl adorned his face as he began to worry for his best friend. Something might have happened to her, otherwise she wouldn't be late.

'No, she's just late.'

Ten more minutes had passed and Snape was growing more concerned by the minute. He would have already gone to her house if only her family, mostly her sister, didn't dislike him so much. Well, her parents didn't really dislike him, they were just apprehensive when it came to him. Still it would be pretty awkward.

'If she doesn't come in five minutes I'll go look for her. To hell with her family!'

The five minutes deadline was almost over when he finally spotted a dark-red smudge in his peripheral vision.

"I'm sooooooo sorry!"

He wanted to yell at her for making him sick with worry but the sight of her dazzling smile made him forget about everything and everyone else.

"It's okay…"

"Guess what?" She said with barely contained excitement.

"What?"

"Oh, you're no fun!" Lily pouted in a cute way for a couple of seconds before a wide smile made its way to her beautiful face. "I got it!"

"It?"

"The letter!!!!"

"The… oh, you mean from Hogwarts?" Hope was clear in his deep dark eyes. With the worry over her lateness he had completely forgotten he too had received a letter earlier that morning.

"No, from Merlin." She said in a poor attempt at sarcasm. "Of course it's from Hogwarts silly!"

Snape couldn't help but smile at her childish behaviour.

"A professor called Dumbledore came to my house to explain everything to my parents."

"You're really going then?" He could barely believe it. I was just TOO good to be real.

"I… don't know…" His heart sank at her words. "I mean, my parents didn't mind, in fact they were quite thrilled with the idea of having a witch in the family. But… you see… Tuney…" She trailed off knowing he would understand what she wanted to say.

"I get it. You'd rather stay with her than being with people like us." 'Than being with me.' He wanted to add.

"What? No! That's not it! But you must understand, she IS my sister."

"If she really liked you she would let you go."

Lily snorted in a very unladylike way. "What would YOU know about it?" She regretted her words the moment they escaped her lips.

Snape's eyes darkened as he turned his back on her and began to walk away.

"Wait! I'm sorry! I didn't mean it like that." With her heart beating painfully against her ribcage Lily watched as her friend continued his path away from her without even looking back. She must have really hurt him for nothing she said seemed to change his mind. Desperately she ran after him hopping to stop him. "Severus!"

The young wizard froze mid-step. Severus… She had called him Severus… She had never called him by his first name before.

He suppressed a shiver of shock and pleasure as he felt a weight crashing against his back. Lily wrapped her small arms around his waist and buried her face in his back. She had made it! She had stopped him.

He still wouldn't turn to her, he was afraid that his eyes might betray his true feelings. It was still too soon for her to know. He should leave now before she found out, but the heat emanating from her body was too tempting for him too resist. He had waited so long to feel her like this. Too damn long. His resolve crumbled at last when he felt something wet against his back. She was crying.

"I-I want to go. I want t-to meet other people l-like me – like u-us. P-please Severus, forgive me." The young red-haired bit her tongue before she could say what she was really feeling at the moment. 'I don't want to loose you…'

Snape turned to face the girl he had secretly liked from afar for so long as he felt her arms dropping heavily from their previous position. He mentally cursed regretting the coldness that lingered now that her warm touch was gone.

He gently brushed her tears away with his thumb. She was so goddamned beautiful!

"You're really going?"

She smiled trough her tears, relieved that he was not mad at her. "Yes."

Snape enthusiastically kissed her soft cheek leaving them with heavy blushes on their faces. "I'm glad."

It was a small and innocent kiss and yet young Severus Snape could honestly say it was the happiest day of his life.

- -

_**A/N:**_** My first HP fanfiction!! **

**This is the first part of three. Hopefully the next one will be up soon! R&R please!!**


	2. The second

_**A/N:**_ Part of the chapter was taken of the original DH book.

_**The second…**_

Thirteen years old Lily and Snape were walking across the castle's courtyard.

"… thought we were supposed to be friends, best friends?" Snape was saying.

"We _are_ Sev, but I don't like some of the people you're hanging around with! I'm sorry, but I detest Avery and Mulciber! _Mulciber_! What do you see in him, Sev? He's creepy! D'you know what he tried to do to Mary Mcdonald the other day?"

Lily had reached a pillar and leaned against it, looking up into the thin, shallow face.

"That was nothing." Said Snape. "It was a laugh, that's all-"

"It was Dark Magic, and if you think that's funny-"

"What about the stuff Potter and his mates get up to?" Demanded Snape. His colour raised again as he said it, unable, it seemed, to hold in his resentment.

"What's Potter got to do with anything?" Said Lily.

"They sneak out at night. There's something weird about that Lupin. Where does he keep going?"

"He's ill, they say he's ill-"

"Every month at the full moon?"

"I know your theory." Said Lily in a rather cold tone. "Why are you so obsessed with them anyway? Why do you care what they're doing at night?"

"I'm just trying to show you they're not as wonderful as everyone seems to think they are."

The intensity of his gaze made her blush.

"They don't use Dark Magic though." She dropped her voice. "And you're being really ungrateful. I heard what happened the other night. You went sneaking down that tunnel by the Whomping Willow and James Potter saved you from whatever's down there-"

Snape's whole face contorted as he spluttered. "Saved? Saved? You think he was playing the hero? He was saving his neck and his friend's too! You're not going to- I won't let you-"

"_Let_ me? _Let _me?"

Lily's bright green eyes were slits. Snape backtracked at once.

"I didn't mean- I just don't want to see you made a fool of- he fancies you, James Potter fancies you!" the words seemed wrenched from him against his will. "And he's not… Everyone thinks… Big Quidditch hero-" Snape's bitterness and dislike were rendering him incoherent, and Lily's eyebrows were travelling further and further up her forehead.

"I know James Potter's an arrogant toerag, I don't need you to tell me that. But Mulciber and Avery's idea of humour is evil. _Evil_, Sev. I don't understand how you can be friends with them."

The moment Lily had insulted James Potter Snape's whole body had relaxed. He didn't even seem to have heard her strictures on Mulciber and Avery.

"Don't ever compare James Potter to your Death Eater friends."

"But Lily-" Snape was cut off by Professor McGonagall who sent them to their classes.

'Just wait Lily, I'll prove you exactly what kind of wizard that Potter is.'

They did not speak for the rest of the day.

-.-.-.-

Lily Evans was pacing incessantly on the otherwise quiet Common Room. Once the anger had subsided the red-haired girl started to get concerned for her boy friend. They hadn't spoken after their little discussion and he hadn't been present at dinner. She had looked for him but he was nowhere to be found. He couldn't have done anything stupid, could he?

Rain fell heavily outside as it had been for the past few hours. It was midnight and Lily was alone in the Common Room until her thoughts were interrupted by the visit of Griffindor's house ghost Nick and the ghost of a beautiful young woman she believed to be the Grey Lady, the ghost of Ravenclaw.

"Are you certain of that?" Asked the female ghost as they crossed the Common Room without sparing its only living occupant as much as a glance.

"Quite certain. I was in the infirmary when they brought him in. I believe his name is Snape. He was found near the Whomping Willow all wet and-" The rest of the sentence was cut off when they crossed the wall into the next room oblivious to the fact they had been overheard.

Lily's blood ran cold as if the ghosts had passed right trough her petite body. Snape… in the infirmary…? No, it couldn't be! It had to be a mistake!

But no matter how many times she tried to tell herself that, Lily knew deep in her heart that it was true.

In haste she got up from the windowsill she had unconsciously sat on upon the phantom's arrival and ran to the infirmary not caring if she was caught out of bed at that hour of the night. She had to see him. She had to see Severus.

When she arrived at her destination she was panting heavily. She had been lucky enough not to be seen thus far but one could not expect to be lucky forever.

The young red-haired soundlessly opened the enormous doors and tiptoed inside. Only a few candles were lit and the infirmary appeared to be empty.

'Maybe he got better and left already.'

Lily shuddered as she walked deeper into the room. She hated the place! Shaking her head to rid herself of such selfish thoughts she continued her search for her friend.

A few moments later she heard a gasp of pain coming from the bed further away from the entrance. As she ran to the patient's side her suspicions proved to be right: it was indeed her friend Severus lying there.

Lily rushed to her friend's side and gently brushed the hair off of his sweaty forehead.

'Oh, Sev! What have you done?'

Her companion offered no response. His face clearly demonstrating the pain he was feeling.

'A fever', she thought and it made sense. Nick had said Snape was found outside in the rain. Merlin only knows for how long he was there!

Silently the red-haired searched for other injuries and found some bandages that covered what she believed to be injuries caused by the Whomping Willow.

With a painful sigh she sat by his side.

'What where you doing there, Sev? Can't you just forget about those imbeciles? Can't you see you are far more important to me than all of them combined? What would I do without you?'

As two silent tears escaped her beautiful emerald orbs she leaned in and gently brushed her lips against his forehead.

She held his hand the entire night until she was found shortly after sunrise by the nurse.

It was the first and only time Lily Evans got detention in her history at Hogwarts.

-.-.-.-

Severus Snape woke up tired in the middle of the morning. Looking around he quickly asserted that he was in the infirmary. A series of images rushed in his mind as he recalled leaving the castle to discover the Potter's group secret. He wanted to do it, to unmask them in front of Lily. But he had miscalculated his strategy and ended up being beaten unconscious by the cursed tree and left outside in the middle of a rainstorm.

Severus cleaned the sweat in his forehead with the back of his hand and stopped abruptly. Gently his fingertips touched a specific point in his forehead. He remembered then, the sweet dream he had in the middle of all the nightmares his illness had provided.

An angel of fire had kissed him in the forehead, leaving behind a sweet scent of lilies.

Snape snorted. As if that was possible. It was hilarious to think Lily would ever do that. Yes, he knew that the angel in his dreams represented Lily Evans for he had dreamt of her every single night ever since he first met her.

Lying back in bed the raven-haired boy closed his eyes and tried to remember the burning sensation that was left in his dream after the angel's kiss.

A sad smile graced his face. Only a dream indeed…

…for how could an angel ever love a monster?


	3. The third

_**The **__**third**__**…**_

Fifteen years old Severus Snape made his way to the place by the river where he was supposed to meet his best friend, his only TRUE friend. It was the last day of summer vacations and he couldn't wait to go back to school. Granted he would have to endure endless 'torture' at the hands of James Potter and his 'gang', but at least he would be far from his family and closer to Lily. Said girl always spent her vacations with her family, they sometimes even went to visit her grandparents at their house, which was located in another town.

Severus really hated vacations!

Once he arrived at the designated place, Snape laid down the basket he had brought with him. He and Lily would be having a picnic. Each one would be bringing his favourite food and then they would share it with the other. Well, that was the agreement, but instead he had picked out the things he knew his friend loved.

Five minutes later Lily Evans arrived and they started their little 'get together'.

Times like that were always treasured by both. When it were just the two of them there was no rivalry between Gryffindor and Slytherin, or even the awkwardness between wizards and muggles as Lily sometimes felt with her family.

When it was just the two of them they were just two good friends sharing experiences, spell tips or even playfully teasing each other.

The afternoon soon ended and they were left to contemplate the astonishing sunset in silent.

Lily closed her eyes in contempt and then looked at her friend. Severus was gazing at her with such an intensity that made her blush, but not necessarily in an unpleasant way.

Emerald locked with onyx for the longest time. Both wizards lost in thought, mesmerized by the way their companion's eyes shone in the diminishing light.

They both leaned in fully aware of the boundary they were stepping upon but none wanting to step back. Their eyes never broke their connection until their lips finally touched, as both of them had wanted to do for so long. Lily was the first to close her eyes in utter bliss. Severus waited until he was sure they both wanted the same before he too closed his eyes, reeling in the feeling of her body pressed against his.

Timidly and very conscious of her lack of experience Lily deepened the kiss, caressing her lover's lips with her moist tongue.

Severus was surprised with her boldness but could not deny he was enjoying every moment of it. He opened his mouth allowing her entrance and gently massaged her tongue with his.

It was an unrushed, sweet but still passionate kiss that ended too soon to both their tastes.

They gazed at each other with heavy blushes adorning their faces. The moment, however, was shattered by Lily's sister Petunia. With out a single word to Severus she practically dragged her sister home with her.

None of them got much sleep that night.

-.-.-.-

The next day they were forced to sit apart in the train with their house companions.

The day after that, in the heat of the moment, he called her a mudblood.

He never forgave himself for it; she did but never got the chance to tell him.

Months later she started dating James; he died inside.

Right after graduation she married her boyfriend; he was completely lost to the darkness.

-.-.-.-

"Look… at me…" As Severus looked into the eyes of the son of the woman he loved so dearly for his entire life he couldn't help but smile.

His promise was fulfilled; he had protected Harry to the best of his abilities. It was now out of his hands.

Now… he could rest….

… now he would finally see HER again…

Severus Snape closed his eyes to the world for the last time with only the image of his lover's green eyes forever burned in his mind.

-.-.-.-

Three kisses they shared in their entire lives.

An innocent kiss of happiness…

… a tender kiss of care…

… a sweet kiss of love…

Three kisses they shared…

… and not one more.

- - - - - - - - -

_**A/N:**_** Yeah, I know: it sucks… totally not happy with it… must rewrite… (sigh)**


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